When I ran a computer consulting business, I started noticing some trends with businesses that were confusing to me.

• We don’t like change, even if it is good, even if it saves us money and time.
• That fear of change makes us very forgiving.
• We fear conflict that ultimately leads to change.

For example, old antiquated hardware and software that breaks and requires constant maintenance cost us more than money. It costs frustration, employee productivity and happiness.  But we keep calling in the IT guy who band-aids us back together.  We fear the hassle of learning new software. Again time, money, productivity and company morale are all at stake.

But now I’ve noticed this pattern in other areas of business, not just where it relates to tech.

We forgive the mistakes of vendors over and over. It’s easier than finding a new one and making a change.

We forgive employees. There are times when managers and business owners look the other way because they fear the process of hiring and training a new replacement. We forget that by “protecting them” – we’re really protecting us from the hassle and fear; we’re hurting our other employees in the process.
We hang on to dead weight accounts. Yes, sometimes you need to let a customer go. The one who has burned you, taken more time, energy and effort than they’ve invested in your business; the one who refused to pay you or takes forever to pay. We forgive them too, for fear we won’t replace the income they represent. (If you have one of these customers… let him go. You’ll more than make up for it in time and happiness.)

I’m not suggesting that at the first mishap you drop a vendor, employees, or clients.  I’m saying if you’ve been dealing with the same old story from one of them for a long period of time, maybe it’s time you step back take an objective review, and evaluate that relationship.

You can be friends with any of those people; social media makes it so easy to fall into friendships with business acquaintances.  You need to remember, however, this is your business. We do forgive friends, but even with friendships, when a relationship is toxic to one party, it’s time to end it.

If you benefit from this post, great, but I wrote it for me.  I wrote it because after:

• repeated bad customer service
• hours and hours on the phone caught in a phone maze, transferred to the wrong department repeatedly, where I had to tell my story again
• repair request after repair request; it took over 4 months to get help
• help arrive and made the problem worse
• a major cell tower went down and is still not replaced
• countless dropped and missed calls
• I have been emotionally and financially abused

I am leaving AT &T.

I’m standing up for myself and my business. I’m done forgiving and I’m taking back control of my communications.

My home box AFTER the 1st repair